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Ze Competition

"Ze Competition" is a silly flash-fiction story written by Scottish writer Russell Cavanagh.

Overheard recently in a small coastal town ... 

"We're running a haiku and micro-poetry competition for the club members this year," said the Chair. "You up for judging it, Piotr?"

    "I no know nutting bout haiku," said Piotr. "Ah em en ertist een ze mould ov Przyboś, nyet von vor ze romanteec doodlings und porple proze."

    "It's only one haiku and one micro-poem of up to four lines per person."

    "Ow many orr een ze clob?"

    "We currently have twenty-three members, out of which fifteen are regular attenders and a few are dead. There's a fee."

    "Ow many preezez?"

    "One first prize and two runners-up in both categories, Piotr."

    "Vat's ze timeline, ven it'z to be jodged by?"

    "Four weeks for the entries to be in. Prizes awarded by you at a special event ceremony the following week."

    "Awl zat time to vrite u haiku und u vore-line poyem?"

    "Yes. Some of our members ..."

    "OK, Ah vill do wit."

    "Thank you, Piotr."

    "OK. Now pazz ze vodka."

 

 

 

CC BY-ND 4.0 Russell Cavanagh 

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